Naming The Stars

by Morrioghan

"I never expected to be the only one left.

It changed so quickly. Everything. We expected that. Buffy was dead. So it had to change. But not this. Never this.

The first signs were subtle. Like hiccups in reality. Nothing... too serious. Mr. Giles said it was probably an after affect of what happened. You know, with Dawn and all.

We researched it. Willow and I, that is. Anya was still in the hospital and Xander really needed to be with her. I wonder where they are now. I like to think that they're okay, that maybe it didn't hit them as hard. Maybe they ended up in a nice world, maybe even a stable one. That would be nice.

There are so many worlds out there. I realize that now. It's different from dimensions, really. And it's not just about demons and shrimp and all. I wonder if there isn't a different world for every person. You know, because of the decisions they make.

And maybe there are worlds that are... well, intact.

I don't know. But it would be nice.

Mr. Giles said that there were... what did he call it? Oh. Infinite realities. Which is really cool, if you think about it.

Only, now, they've gotten kinda mushed together.

I saw a Willow yesterday. I... I... I think it was yesterday. She was very nice. Her and Oz were looking for Buffy. Their Buffy. I don't think they've been here long. `Cause they... they think they'll find her.

I didn't tell them the truth, though. They had so much hope, you know. And it'll be gone soon enough. Let them keep it. Just a while longer.

I remember when I lost Willow. My Willow.

But that's not yet. No. That came later. I think. Yes. That's it. Spike came first, you see."

***

"`Watcher? What the Hell?' Spike looked confused, and angry.

`The world is topsy turvy. It's having a party. Only it's not the world. So much more than that. Crash and swirl and dance and bleed. Such a terrible lovely mess we have.'

We were surprised to see him with Drusilla. Yes. I think they were together. We didn't realize that then. We were to worried about the world, you see. That, and we were kinda confused.

One minute we were researching at the Magic Box, and the next we were in a library. Willow told me later that it was the high school library. Only, she said said it wasn't 'right.'

Spike wasn't `right' either. We found that out. Only it was too late then. It's always too late.

`Spike? What's going on here? Where did Drusilla come from?' Giles did that scrunchy thing with his nose. He didn't take off his glasses, though. He didn't have time.

`Spike.' Dawn was happy to see him. She was always happy to see Spike. Especially after Buffy. I think they bonded, you know, after she was gone. So she really wasn't expecting what happened. None of us were.

`What have we here? Tasty little bit, aren't you? Don't mind it I do.' That's when he grabbed her. `Here, Luv.' Spike pushed Dawn towards Dru.

`Yummy. I see worlds in this one. They dance together. They bleed. I want to taste them.'

`Course, pet. Save me a nibble, will you?'

We all kinda charged then.

Only things changed again, and we didn't quite end up where we planned. There was a wave and they were gone. Or maybe we were gone. I've never been real sure on that.

When I woke up, Willow and I were in a forest. Alone.

She was crying.

We cried a lot in the beginning. I don't think Willow ever really stopped. Only her tears didn't always show, if you know what I mean.

It was hard. We never knew where we were or where we would be. I don't know how we survived.

Eventually we met a man who told us the waves were called shifts, and that different worlds were sliding into each other. We'd kind of figured that last part out, but it was nice to have a name for it. I wonder what happened to him? He was nice, in a gruff kinda way.

Names are important, you know.

Names have power.

For a while we thought we might be able to stop it. Willow tried so hard. Spell after spell. I never knew she had such strength. I mean, I knew she was strong... but the things she did were incredible.

Not that they worked or anything. But she tried. She really did. She put everything she had into her magic. The power of some of the spells... of the forces she called on... they could have killed her.

But they didn't. The shifts did.

A shift took her right out of my arms as we were sleeping. Well... m most of her. I like to pretend that she's alive. That she's just some place else. Only, there was so much blood, and bits, and things.

It's a nice dream, though. I like dreams.

I'm tired now.

It's late and my shift's almost here.

My shift?

Oh, I don't know when it will come. But it will. I just have to be patient. That's all.

Oh, it's cool if you want to wait with me.

I used to name the stars too... well the constellations, anyway. I even showed Willow how. She was really good at it, what with all the practice we had after the shifts started. They change so much now, and I can't seem to find anymore names.

Yeah, it would be confusing if they all had the same name."

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